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What is your parenting style (whether or not you have kids)? - JasonBlack - 10-04-2022
What are some of your thoughts on parenting? Do you have kids? Do you want kids?
RE: What is your parenting style (whether or not you have kids)? - JasonBlack - 10-04-2022
My parenting style is as follows
1) There are rules, and some of them are strict, but it's important to me that you understand them, so I will do my best to explain them thoroughly and encourage questions.
2) Public school is a joke. I am not having kids until I know I can afford a good private school and private tutor.
3) It's important to have time to yourself. None of this "you have to stay busy!" nonsense that boomers tried to shove down my throat.
4) I am an extremely affectionate person. I will let you know regularly that I will always love you.
5) Anyone living in my household will know the basics of budgeting, financial responsibility and bare bones investing before leaving. You don't have to become rich, but you will know what managing money looks like in the real world so that you can use it to do/get what you want.
6) I'm not anti-sexuality by any means, but I will make sure my children understand the consequences of both irresponsible sex and having sex with an excessive amount of partners. Note: the consequences of this are not necessarily the same for males and females, because the mechanisms of pair bonding work differently.
7) If you want me to pay for your post-secondary education, I'm happy to do so, but you have to have a plan first. We will begin working on this no later than when you start high school. "The college experience" is a bunch of price-inflated nonsense that just encourages people to become alcoholics, whores and people who hate their culture, their country, and, often, even their own family. Obviously, plans will change when you're young, but the more you can plan in advance, the better.
8) If you are trans, I will support you, but no gender-corrective surgery until you are an adult and can make an informed decision.
9) I am open to spanking, but only for serious offenses where they know the consequences ahead of time, and never out of anger.
10) You have to stay physically fit, but how you choose to do so is up to you.
11) Baring a few exceptions, I am willing to pay for any non-fiction book (print or audio) you want to purchase.
12) If you are a boy, you need to at least try some form of martial arts, but if you really don't like it, I won't push you.
13) I don't care if you do a little marijuana or alcohol, but no hard drugs.
14) If you want to party, no getting drunk unless you know and trust everyone there.
15) Punishment is for deliberately breaking rules, not misunderstandings. In the case of the former, I don't tend to scream a lot. The punishment speaks for itself.
16) Punishment for bullying will be especially severe, but, as usual, I will make sure to get both sides of the issue before levying punishment.
17) Malicious gossip will get you punished too. Don't be a passive-aggressive bitch.
18) We go to church every Sunday. You can make your own decisions about religion as an adult, but this is a Christian household.
19) We will be discussing the common pitfalls people run into in relationships. Most men and women have a natural tendency to be attracted to partners who are very bad for them (usually sociopathic men and BPD women).
20) You are encouraged to get a part time job for extra spending capital.
21) No soft drinks in my household. You will also be instructed on how to cook a variety of meals so that you can avoid the ramen, pizza and mountain dew nonsense most people go through in their early 20s. Even at that age, if you cannot afford good food, I'm happy to spare some extra money if you can prove you're being responsible with it.
22) You have to at least try a musical instrument and/or singing for 2 years. After that, it's up to you if you wish to continue.
23) By the time you are old enough to start asking questions, I will have a file ready of all sorts of studies and evidence to support any lessons I teach you.
24) It's important that my house is a good spot to hangout. I will make a conscious effort not to embarrass you in front of your friends and to make sure there is good food around.
25) You are allowed to date, but I want to meet him/her. As long as I know they will treat you well and there aren't obvious red flags, I will be supportive, but I reserve the right to intervene if they are someone who will be a destructive influence.
26) Privacy is important to me. It's important all of my children have their own room and personal space, but, as usual, I reserve the right to search your things under justifiable circumstances.
27) You will know how to use a gun properly before leaving my household.
28) Truly understanding history is usually not something which is possible for most people before age 18, but I will make sure you know at least the basics of various regimes that lead to human rights violations, including fascism, several iterations of communism, various dogmatic religious cults, etc. You will not leave my house under the naive notion that the world is some good or fair place.
29) If you don't have speech and debate classes, you will take outside courses or clubs in those subjects.
30) If you have a teen pregnancy, don't get an abortion unless your health is in serious jeopardy. I will take care of my grandchild.
31) "Children should be seen and heard" is a a neglectful and downright evil style of parenting. You are encouraged to share your opinions, but you will also be told when you are misinformed or need to study more before coming to a conclusion.
32) If I ever get servants, you will treat them with as much respect as you treat me or you will be severely punished. They are earning a living and you are not, so no going around thinking you're better than people who work and survive independently, at least until you are able to do the same.
RE: What is your parenting style (whether or not you have kids)? - pbrower2a - 10-04-2022
General pattern: authoritative. Authoritarians wreck children with brutality and repression, and loosey-goosey parents get wild savages as kids. The worst are those who swing wildly from one pattern to the other, alternating neglect and sever punishment. For the kids, nothing makes sense, and their world becomes an absurd nightmare.
1. Parents must set appropriate examples. Got any towels with the name of the motel on the? You have taught that it is OK to steal a souvenir from the not-so-rich franchisee of some big business. Drunkenness and drugs are bad news in themselves. Got some hustles for getting stuff without paying for them? Getting cable or stealing internet or power without paying? Then you are teaching that theft is OK if you get away with it. OK, pens with advertising are OK as if business cards. One of the most important lessons to learn in a capitalist order is pay the price or do without.
2. Spanking is appropriate only in cases in which one wants a child to associate misconduct with pain or at least the possibility of injury. Playing with fire or electrical power, shouting ethnic slurs at ethnic minorities. Carnivores bite and scratch; horses kick. You will learn the rules.
The Ten Commandments are generally good, although idolatry is largely irrelevant today (unless you are to treat something like a political cult or pornography as idolatry). Maybe you can make a fable out of an example of a violation of the commandment to honor parents.
Example: once upon a time there was a German boy who ratted out his parents for harboring a Jew. The Jew was of course sent to a murder camp and gassed. The boy's parents were executed as traitors. But the Party honored him! The War ended and he was alone without loved ones. One night he wandered off aimlessly into the path of an American tank. He was crushed to death.
Of course there are other newer commandments, such as to not mess with children or abandon the elderly and infirm, to not own slaves, and to not get stupefied on drugs or alcohol (let alone drive drunk!)
3. As I would not keep a rattlesnake in the house, neither would I keep a gun unless a certifiable hunting rifle.
4. Household chores and school homework come before electronic entertainments of any kind. You will not stay up excessively late (as I caught one case in school as a substitute -- "Half Past Letterman").
RE: What is your parenting style (whether or not you have kids)? - JasonBlack - 10-04-2022
^pretty reasonable for the most part.
RE: What is your parenting style (whether or not you have kids)? - pbrower2a - 10-05-2022
Yes. I want any of my kids (if I had them) obeying the law. Civil disobedience will be expected, but I will not accept even speeding.
As for college -- I miss the days in which college was as inexpensive as a hobby. College kids must do real, humbling work so that they not become narcissists. Factory work, farm labor, domestic service, sales-clerking, or fast-food work will well serve to destroy Trump-like, degrading and destructive narcissism.
If at all possible there will be a pet -- maybe a cat from which one graduates to a dog. Part of the responsibility will be to teach the dog to respect the cat -- if the cat needs any help. Dogs compel good behavior by us. A hint: Donald Trump has never had a pet dog. Dogs do not get along well with sociopaths unless specifically trained (think of Hitler's dog Blondi, a gift from the SS).