The Maelstrom of Violence

[pbrower2a]

(10-01-2017, 01:43 AM)Classic-Xer Wrote: I'm a high 120 something. Not bragging, it's just what I am. Do yourself a favor and don't ever act (give me the signs in your writing), approach me, imply or treat me as if I'm stupid or some how below you   ever again. You are above me in age, grammar skills for now and that's it. According to that chart, I could have been a really good teacher if I wanted to be one. I choose to be a HVAC contractor.   If you do, I will begin turn you into a laughing stock. I know that I could do it. You need this place. You need to vent. You need the support of others in this place. Me, I don't because I have a rather large group of support (family, friends, close acquaintances) that I've established over the years. I may not be able to write but I can read very well and process very well.

You appear to be learning stuff from the chart. You seem to be learning stuff  that I figured out on my own a long time ago without the chart. Yes, a lot of people waste their intelligence. I had a lot of smart people who for one reason or another couldn't ever get there shit together, so to speak.    My mom always told me that my dad was underachiever and that I shouldn't be like my dad in that way. She also told me that he had told her that he was going die young during his early 30's. He died at the age of 51. He must have knew his fate. My mom liked nice things. My dad didn't care about having nice things. Dad was happy with plain things. My brother is just like her. I'm kinda like her. I'd prefer nice things but I'm ok with plain things. I don't think a broken down body is worth a house full of nice things. Me, whether it's nice or just plain, it must be quality.

I do some things very well and some things badly. That is the human norm. I have at best average mechanical aptitude, so I would not be a good HVAC technician, and long-unrecognized Asperger's syndrome has badly messed up my life.

I have great intellectual power. The problem is that I could not use it. I was led into activities horribly unsuited to anyone with Asperger's, activities in which I was doomed to failure. I developed a reputation for clueless eccentricity. Today the educational system would catch Asperger's from the stilted language that I used as a child, from being bullied often, and doing badly in team sports.

I must act to seem normal. I have to explain my slip-ups as "nobody is perfect".

I can imagine a better life for myself. But that requires turning the calendar back, which would surely hurt someone as badly as I might do better.