I just got a book, Loving Someone with Asperger's Syndrome. Anyone who gets hooked on me (I have some virtues -- I am trustworthy with assets, vehicles, and especially the welfare of the helpless) needs to know what to expect. If it took a therapist thirty minutes to get a diagnosis, it won;t take long to find something creepy about me. I might as well expose it quickly.
If getting off drugs and alcohol is tough, getting off Asperger's Syndrome is simply impossible. I have much explaining to do, and now that I know what has me (one does not have Asperger's -- it has you!) in thrall I can explain it well. Expect weird responses to stimuli. I know what to expect of others, and others might as well know what to expect of me. Not having a clue, even if one is otherwise competent, and drawing the wrong conclusions is not dishonesty.
I have something to offer in a relationship. I am 'high-functioning' enough that I might be able to hold onto some job. I could probably be a good stepfather even with my evident limitations. I put a high value on learning, and I have a good work ethic even if I have a spotty work history and have underachieved for my intelligence and education. I do office politics as ineptly as anyone, and I handle depersonalizing stress badly. That is Asperger's. Had I known about it I might have done everything differently. Who knows what I might have done?
But she -- and any children -- need to know what they are getting. Can I love? Probably; love is a virtue, and if one practices any virtue one gets its mark. Will I pose difficulties? Who doesn't? At the least I am not a reckless spender, I am not greedy and materialistic, I can offer a wholesome (if archaic) culture, I know what to judge and what to let slide, and I don't have chemical dependencies. I have shown loyalty to people who have left me in financial and emotional ruin (not their choice -- their circumstances and demises), and I would just as soon show loyalties to people who don't do such.
Bored, broke, and lonely -- it sounds like the title of a bad country music song. Bach is more to my liking.
If getting off drugs and alcohol is tough, getting off Asperger's Syndrome is simply impossible. I have much explaining to do, and now that I know what has me (one does not have Asperger's -- it has you!) in thrall I can explain it well. Expect weird responses to stimuli. I know what to expect of others, and others might as well know what to expect of me. Not having a clue, even if one is otherwise competent, and drawing the wrong conclusions is not dishonesty.
I have something to offer in a relationship. I am 'high-functioning' enough that I might be able to hold onto some job. I could probably be a good stepfather even with my evident limitations. I put a high value on learning, and I have a good work ethic even if I have a spotty work history and have underachieved for my intelligence and education. I do office politics as ineptly as anyone, and I handle depersonalizing stress badly. That is Asperger's. Had I known about it I might have done everything differently. Who knows what I might have done?
But she -- and any children -- need to know what they are getting. Can I love? Probably; love is a virtue, and if one practices any virtue one gets its mark. Will I pose difficulties? Who doesn't? At the least I am not a reckless spender, I am not greedy and materialistic, I can offer a wholesome (if archaic) culture, I know what to judge and what to let slide, and I don't have chemical dependencies. I have shown loyalty to people who have left me in financial and emotional ruin (not their choice -- their circumstances and demises), and I would just as soon show loyalties to people who don't do such.
Bored, broke, and lonely -- it sounds like the title of a bad country music song. Bach is more to my liking.
The ideal subject of totalitarian rule is not the convinced Nazi or the dedicated Communist but instead the people for whom the distinction between fact and fiction, true and false, no longer exists -- Hannah Arendt.