** 14-Aug-2021 World View: Planning For Death
Tom Mazanec" Wrote:> I have just been diagnosed with early stage dementia. Naturally,
> this has changed my views of my personal future dramatically.
> What advice can you give for someone who will have to deal with
> this personal "storm" at the same time the world is dealing with
> its own?
There are several things you should do to plan for the future.
I've been forgetful my whole life, but it's gradually gotten worse.
When I was younger, pre-personal computer, I used to carry around a
pocket appointment calendar where I would write things down. I just
did an internet search for that item and there are still many of them
still available.
When I got a personal computer, I would keep track of everything on
computer files. At the end of each day, I'd print out the next day's
schedule on a sheet of paper, and I'd carry that around all day, in
the same way I used to carry the appointment calendar. During the
day, I would write down things I needed to remember on that same piece
of paper. At the end of the day, I'd copy the things I'd written down
into my computer files, and then I'd print out the next day's
schedule.
So today I'm really lucky because my hip pain is so bad that I can't
walk farther than the mailbox, and even that's a struggle. I'm
especially lucky since I have to sit in front of my computer all day,
which means I won't have to deal with the inconvenience of carrying
around an appointment book or even a printed piece of paper.
So today I haven't been diagnosed with dementia, but I forget things.
So I keep track of everything on my computer -- bills, pills, accounts,
names, phone numbers, phone calls, etc. There are special issues due
to the fact that I write articles about almost 200 countries
throughout history, so I have to have way to retrieve previous
conclusions about any given country or event, and to keep track of new
media sources. So I've set all that up, and I've written a lot of
personal software to make it as easy as possible for me.
So my point is that if you haven't already been using your computer to
keep track of everything in your life, you should start doing so. If
you're going to be forgetting things, then you need some system for
keeping track of things that you might forget.
That's one part of your planning. The other part of your planning is
to decide how and under what circumstances you're going to kill
yourself. This is particularly important if, as in my case, your pain
grows worse every week. You need to kill yourself because at some
point somebody who supposedly "cares" for you will decide to jab you
with a needle, turn you into a zombie, and put you into a room similar
to the ones where the Chinese put Uighurs for re-education and
indoctrination. It will be a fate far worse than death, but those who
supposedly "care" for you will make sure that you continue to suffer
as long as they can. Nothing will matter to them more than keeping
you alive so that you can continue to suffer for as long as possible,
since that will make the people who "care" for you happy, even as they
make vomitworthy statements about their hearts reaching out to you.
By the way, if the ones who "care" for you get some sort of income or
annuity on your behalf, then you're really doomed unless you kill
yourself. (See Britney Spears)
In your case, I gather that you're heavily embedded in the Catholic
Church, so you would end up being a zombie in a Catholic "home" of
some sort. Every now and then there's an investigation on the BBC of
some Catholic home where the residents are absolutely miserable, and
where their bodies are dumped into a mass grave when they die. So
unless you kill yourself first, that's probably your fate.
One thing that really pisses me off is that killing yourself is the
most important decision of your life, and there's no one you can ask
about it. It would be nice if you could ask you doctor, "I might have
to kill myself one day. What's the best way to do it?" but that kind
of question is forbidden. Though of course I violate the forbidden
all the time, and several years go, I mentioned to my doctor in an
offhand manner that some day in the future I might kill myself. Well
he freaked out and began to scream at me at the top of his lungs,
implying that I was crazy. I asked why he was getting so upset, and
he screamed "Because I care about you." OK, but as the screaming
continued, it appeared that there was another reason he was upset --
he would have to fill out paperwork and report me. I asked him how
long he was going to keep me locked up. He said that it isn't up to
him. I managed to calm him down by telling him that it would be years
in the future. I know that it's three days from another time when a
nutjob called the police who came to my apartment to "save" me while I
was in the middle of writing a book, and they wanted to lock me up for
three days, and they had an ambulance there and everything. So I made
it clear that they would have to take me violently, and when they said
they wouldn't be violent, I just said "let yourself out," and I went
back to my computer and back to work. The medical people stared at
me, took my blood pressure and asked me what pills I was taking. They
eventually just left. So as you make your plans to kill yourself,
that's the kind of thing you might have to put up with from nutjob
do-gooder idiots.
Here's one more anecdote, based on the fact that it's perfectly ok to
kill a baby with decades of life ahead of him, but it's not ok for an
old person to kill himself. I told a social worker that I might kill
myself some day. She got all agitated, and said that I had no right
to do that. That really made me laugh. I said, "Well, you're a woman
living in Massachusetts, so I assume that you're a feminist, and I
assume you go around all the time screaming 'It's my body, and nobody
has the right to tell me what to do with it.' Well, I'm 7x years old,
and it's my body, and nobody has the right to tell me what to do with
it." I really enjoyed telling her that. It stopped her in her
tracks.
So anyway, you have to make a plan. You have a choice whether to let
your morbid Catholic friends decide what meat locker they're going to
store you in, or whether you'll take control of your own (end of)
life. Unfortunately, you're pretty much on your own making that kind
of decision. If you have a gun or a tall building available, then
those are possible choices.
Otherwise you may have to buy some poison or something like that to
kill yourself. There are two problems here. One is that the jackass
authorities and do-gooders make if their business to keep you from
buying anything like that. And the second problem is that the Chinese
are only too happy to sell Nembutol or a similar substance to you
through mail order, but they charge a lot of money and just send you a
bag of sugar.
The best source of information of this type that I'm aware of is the
Peaceful Pill Handbook. Just do an internet search for those words.
I started subscribing to their monthly service several years ago for
$85 for two years. You can also buy the printed edition of their book
for $40, or you can find used copies online for less. But try to get
as up to date a copy as possible. Before you can subscribe, they'll
ask you to provide proof that you're over age 50.
One wild card event is the timing of the attack by the Gongshi Blood
Company. Whether they plan to colonize America or not, they're going
to have to attack America because America will defend Taiwan and
Japan. That could come at any time, though a lot of people believe
they'll wait until after the February Olympics in Beijing.
In my case, living on the edge of MIT, I'm lucky that I'll probably be
killed by the first missile attack. But if you live far away from any
likely target, then an attack by the Blood Company will keep you alive
but make your life worse. That's another reason why you have to be
prepared to kill yourself.
Plan, plan, plan ahead.